Quiet Love
by Elraralia
Summary: [COMPLETED] Love is always beautiful, but what happens if both sides are frightened and muddled? (A rewrite of my old story.)
1. The First Meeting

_This is actually not a new story, but a rewritten version of my old fic Yours Forever. I wrote that when I just started off at and now when I read it again I don't think it as good anymore so I decided to rewrite it. Hope this one will prove to be an improvement!_

**Disclaimer: Sadly for me, I don't own the rights to Lord of the Rings. However, I did create some of the characters in my story, so those do belong to me… muahahahaha.**

* * *

**Chapter 1 : The First Meeting**

* * *

Háthien watched the Elves before her preparing for their journey to Rivendell. Among them were her older brother Celoril, and Legolas, the Prince of Mirkwood. She watched as they whispered in Elvish to their horses, and wished she could go on the journey as well. She had never been to Rivendell, and wished to see what it was like. Celoril had been there once before, and he had come back with tales of its beauty and warmth and also of the wisdom of Lord Elrond. Háthien wished she could be allowed to make the journey, but this time the Elves had been summoned to Rivendell for some secret cause which even Celoril could not tell her of. She wondered if Legolas knew. Close as he was to his father, he would probably have knowledge of everything that came to Thranduil. Although her brother and Legolas were good friends, she had never met him before. But she had watched him from a distance, and admired his loyalty to his people, and his unfaltering determination to protect his homeland.

Háthien thought very highly of Legolas.

Celoril, satisfied that all his things were packed, came up to his family. After exchanging words with his parents, promising to be careful and to send their regards to some friends in Rivendell, he turned to his sister. "You behave, all right?" he said, his eyes twinkling. "Don't get into any trouble without me."

"_You _are the one always getting _me_ into trouble, Celoril," Háthien shot back with a laugh. "I'll be just fine on my own. I wish I could go with you to Rivendell, though."

"Perhaps one day we will go together. There's much that I want you to see there." Celoril pulled his sister close for a hug. "You take care of yourself, and I'll be back soon. Then we can get up to mischief together again."

"All right, _muindor_. I'll be waiting for you to get back."

"Is this your sister, Celoril?" Legolas had approached, after he had spoken with his father, and was standing behind Celoril with his arms crossed, a smile on his face. "You certainly have been keeping her a secret, haven't you? We've been friends for so long, and I have never even met her!"

"Well, meet her now, then!" Celoril laughed. "This is my younger sister, Háthien."

"I'm not _that_ young anymore," Háthien said, smiling, but she blushed a little under the eyes of Legolas. "It's good to meet you at last, my lord." Nobody treated Legolas like royalty in Mirkwood, but Háthien felt it strange to address Legolas in any other way on their first meeting.

"The pleasure's all mine, but please, call me Legolas. 'My lord' sounds strange." Legolas looked at Háthien intently. Her beauty was not that of legends, but she was beautiful all the same. Her friendly nature seemed to radiate from within her, and she possessed a confidence and strength that he had not seen in many people. He could help feeling grateful that he had met her before this journey to Rivendell. He knew that the news of Gollum's escape would not be well received, and wondered what effect it would have on how things turned out.

"If you wish," Háthien replied.

It was time to leave. Legolas went back to his horse as Celoril embraced his sister one more time. He looked beyond the gates of the Elven realm in Mirkwood with no idea of what lay in his future.

"Be careful. We await your return to Mirkwood with great anticipation," Thranduil said, coming to stand by him.

Legolas smiled down at his father. "Don't you worry, _ada_, I will be all right. Everything will be all right. I have no doubt that a solution would be found."

As the Elves rode out of the gates, Legolas looked back. His father was standing there; he would not budge until they were all out of his sight. But standing some distance behind him was a maiden, watching as the Elves rode away from Mirkwood. It was Háthien. When she saw him looking back, she raised a hand to wave. Legolas smiled and waved back.

Suddenly he could not wait to fulfil his duties, so that he could hurry back to Mirkwood to learn more about this special elfmaiden.__


	2. Moving On

_To Kermit: Well I hope you will still have your happy face after this chapter! And thanks for correcting me, I already replaced the previous chapter._

_To RiRiana: Yeah, I prefer this version too, it's better!_

_To merrymagic56 and Shorty51: Thanks!_

* * *

**Chapter 2 : Moving On**

* * *

"They've returned!"

Háthien dropped her book and ran as fast as she could to the gates. The guards in their posts could already see the riders from above, but Háthien could not see them yet. She waited anxiously, wanting to see her brother and Legolas again. She had missed them both. She never really understood why she would miss Legolas like she had, since she had only met him once, but she had spent so much time thinking about him, wondering how he was. Sometimes his face had even invaded her dreams, and now she could not wait to see him again in the flesh.

The riders now came into view, and Háthien peered at them. She could not spot Legolas, even though she saw Celoril riding at the front. Worry began to creep into her bones, but she pushed them away, telling herself that he would be coming, that her eyes were playing mean tricks on her.

Even when they rode through the gates and Legolas was nowhere to be seen, Háthien was still telling herself that there had been a dreadful mistake.

Celoril dismounted the minute he saw his sister and ran towards her, hugging her tightly. "It's so good to see you again, my sister!" he said. "I've missed you!"

"I've missed you too," Háthien whispered back to her brother. "Next time, you _have_ to bring me wherever you go." She looked around. "Where is Legolas?"

"He was chosen to represent the Elves on a quest." Celoril quickly told Háthien all that was decided at the council. He noted the worry on his sister's face. "Don't worry, _muinthel_, Legolas knows full well how to take care of himself. It is a great honour for him to be chosen."

"I know it is a great honour, but who's to know the dangers that he will face? Anything is possible."

Celoril put an arm around his sister. "It is a risky mission, but it must be done. Legolas was glad to be chosen, and eager to go. He told me that if there were any way he could be of service to Middle Earth, he would take any responsibility immediately. He said that it was an honour for Mirkwood that he was chosen. We should be proud of him. He knows what he is doing, and he is in the company of many capable individuals. I have faith that he will be all right. Do you?"

Háthien sighed. "Yes, _muindor_, I do." But she still couldn't help but worry about him, and knew that she would not rest easy until she saw him again.

* * *

_After the War of the Ring…_

* * *

As the Elves began moving, Háthien turned for one last look at Mirkwood, now renamed Eryn Lasgalen by Thranduil and Celeborn. She had never left Mirkwood in the long years of her life, and she would miss it, but she also knew that there was no way she could stay. Too much had been lost here. Both her father and brother had been killed by Orcs, and she could only stand by helplessly as her mother died from grief, fading away more and more each day until there was barely anything of her left. There was too much in Mirkwood that was now pushing her away, and she could only pray that in Ithilien she would find the peace and happiness she once had.

"_Naevaer, Eryn Lasgalen_."

"Saying goodbye?" Legolas asked, riding up to her. He looked at her, concerned. It could not be easy for her to leave Mirkwood. It was all she had ever known.

Háthien nodded. She refused to let go of the tears that blurred her vision. She was tired of crying, and she wanted to put everything behind her. Now, all she wanted was peace, and somewhere for her heart to mend. Celoril was not here for her now, and she told herself that she had to be strong. But it was so exhausting…

"Why are you leaving, Háthien?"

She gestured to the trees, the houses, everything. "Too many memories walk on this land. And that is all that I have now. Memories. There is nothing else left for me here in Mirkwood. I want to find someplace else where I can try to move on, and live life alone in peace."

Sadness invaded Legolas' heart as he watched a tear slide down Háthien's cheek. He could find no words to say to her, no way to comfort her. She once had everything one could want, a loving family and a beautiful home, and had lost everything in the blink of an eye. He nudged his horse closer to her, and took her hand. "You're not alone. Celoril was a dear friend, and I miss him too. I know that there is no way I could replace him, but I'll always be here for you whenever you need someone to turn to, _gwathel_."

Háthien squeezed his hand gratefully, and turned away. Legolas sighed. "During the War of the Ring I fought so many, fought in the greatest battle of our time. From one who did not understand death, it became something I witnessed at every turn. I wonder, through this great ordeal, how many children have become orphans, how many wives become widows, how many parents have lost their children? At times, it just does not seem fair that so much had to be lost."

"Much was lost," Háthien said distantly. "But all for a good cause. It had to be done, for the freedom of Middle Earth. Men died so that their sons could experience fatherhood. Mothers made their sacrifices so that their daughters would someday carry their own children. Those who died today died for those who live tomorrow, just as those who live tomorrow might have to die for the next generation. The fallen are gone forever, but they have left to us the most beautiful gift: the gift of life. And we repay them by remembering them, and honouring them. It is the only thing we can do now."

Legolas looked at Háthien, amazed. With those words she had demonstrated a wisdom and a strength so admirable that he was struck speechless. How she had changed when he was away! When he left she was a carefree child, knowing only love and laughter. Now she had grown into a woman who knew heartbreak and lost, and had refused to succumb to the overwhelming power of suffering. The joyful light in her eyes had dimmed, but the fire in her heart burned on, strong as ever, and it demanded respect.

He looked down. She had made no move to withdraw her hand, and he still held it. "Ithilien is beautiful," he said at last. "The Elves could make it even more so, with the help of Faramir and the people of Gondor. I cannot tell you that you will forget all sadness there, but I will do all I can for you, that I promise."

"Thank you," she said softly. "You will never know how much I needed to hear those words."


	3. Ithilien

_To RiRiana: Thanks, I'm glad that this version has improved!_

_To xeledhwenx: It's great to know that you like this!_

_To Shorty51: Thanks for the cookie, it was yummy! And here's the next chapter!_

* * *

**Chapter 3 : Ithilien**

* * *

Time passed, and Ithilien blossomed under the care of both the Elves brought by Legolas and the Men led by Faramir. Everyone who saw it fell in love with it's exquisite beauty, and the feeling of life that was all around. Over time Háthien came to love Ithilien just as she had loved Mirkwood. She had found her peace, and her happiness.

She knew not what she would have done without Legolas. Her first few days in Ithilien were tainted by homesickness, and he had been by her side as often as he could, caring for her, making sure that she was all right. Even now, he would make time for her after he had fulfilled his duties. He looked after her just as Celoril would have done if he had been alive. Háthien was grateful to have Legolas in her life. Yet with that came the one discontentment in her life. She had come to realise that the feeling that came over her whenever she saw his face was special, that she only felt this way when she was around him. She had come to realise that she loved him, and not in the way that she had loved Celoril. But he looked to her only as a sister, and she did not want to risk this relationship that they had, so she played along, hiding her true feelings, and treating him as a brother. The way he expected to be treated.

"Háthien!"

She turned and smiled, seeing a stout, bearded dwarf coming towards her. "Good morning, Gimli," she said. "It is good to see you in Ithilien again."

Gimli, named Elf-friend for his great friendship to Legolas, came to Ithilien just as often as Legolas went to the Glittering Caves. The friendship the odd pair shared was strong, and nothing could possibly break the trust they had for each other. Now Háthien often joined them whenever Gimli came to Ithilien. The dwarf held Háthien in high regard, admiring her for her strength and spirit, while she admired him for his courage and joviality.

"And it is good to see you as well," he replied with a twinkle in his eye. "You seem more beautiful each time I see you."

"You flatter me too much, Gimli. I know for a fact that I do not look any different. You're just saying it to please me."

"Perhaps he is saying it so that I will not fight him." Legolas had come up to them, grinning broadly.

Háthien laugh. "The two of you never fight."

"For you, we might," Gimli remarked. "Legolas is extremely protective whenever it comes to anything concerning you."

Háthien blushed. "He is too much of an older brother for me," she said truthfully.

"But don't you like me, _gwathel_? If you would prefer to fend for yourself, I could always do my best to keep my distance," Legolas said jokingly. He knew that his comment would make Háthien smile. Recently he had found himself doing his best to say things that would bring a smile to her face. Her smile was something he looked forward to seeing every single day, and it was the first thing that came to his mind every morning when he watched the sun rise.

She _did_ smile. "Of course I like you, _gwanur_. I wouldn't be here if I didn't like your company."

"And neither would I," Gimli said quickly. "If I had to choose between the both of you, I would rather be in the company of a beautiful maiden than a well-groomed elf prince."

Legolas laughed at his best friend's joke. "Then I am glad that I have found a way into Háthien's good books, or I would be a very lonely person."

They all laughed, sitting down on the ground, leaning against a tree as they liked to do on the cool, refreshing mornings. It was these moments that Háthien truly lived for, to be sitting between the one she loved and a friend she trusted. It was in these moments when she felt all the love that she used to take for granted. It was the thought of these moments that helped her get through the bad nights, when loneliness crept into her heart, and she missed her family even more than ever.

Gimli laughed out loud suddenly. "I was just thinking about the time when Legolas and I first met," he said. "We just could not get along!"

"Gimli had a remarkable gift at always finding ways to get on my nerves," Legolas told Háthien. "Even until now, I cannot think how he had that talent."

"You speak as if you never got on my nerves!" Gimli retorted.

"Indeed, I think that I always behaved most graciously," Legolas joked.

"You two must have been such a pain for the rest of the Fellowship! It was a wonder that they didn't try to lose you on the journey," Háthein said with a laugh.

Gimli cleared his throat. "Actually, with all the fighting and running we had to do, I think they did try."

Their laughter rang out in the gardens, and all who overheard knew that the Lord of the Glittering Caves was in Ithilien, and in the company of Legolas and his adopted sister Háthien.

They chatted on for a while, talking of anything that came to their minds. Then Háthien stood up. "Well, I should be going now, there are things that I have to do," she said. "I'll see you both later in the day, then." She walked off, turning to wave goodbye. Legolas and Gimli watched her go.

"When are you going to tell her?" Gimli asked casually.

Legolas turned to look at him, surprised. "I don't understand; tell her what?"

"That you don't want her as a sister, but as… something else."

Legolas's eyes widened. "How did you know?"

"Come, Legolas, we've been friends for such a long time. I know you all too well. The way you behave around her is just different from how you behave around other elfmaidens. Or have you not noticed that yourself?"

"I thought I hid it well," Legolas muttered. He sighed. "She looks to me as a brother. To her, I am just like a replacement of the brother she loved and lost. I can't take that away from her. If I tell her, things would never be the same again."

"So you'll just keep quiet? For how long? Forever?"

"Yes, forever."

"At the expense of your own heart?"

Legolas sighed again. "Yes, even that."


	4. Difficult

_I'm sorry I haven't written for quite awhile, I'm actually in the middle of major exams! But I get this weekend off and next week is a easygoing week for the exams so I'm back online writing!_

_To Shorty51: Haha, you're really spoiling me!_

_To RiRiana: I'm back!!! 0)_

_To GreenEyedElfGoddess: I think things in this story will happen slightly faster than my original because when I read my original again I was so irritated by how draggy it was lol._

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**Chapter 4 : Difficult**

* * *

"Háthien!"

She turned towards the voice, and smiled to see Legolas sitting on a bench next to Gimli. It was always a heart-warming sight, to see two such different people so connected in friendship. She began walking towards them, her original errand forgotten.

The two stood as she approached them. "Yes, _gwanur_?" The word tore at her heart, but she no longer felt it as she used to do. She was ready to love him secretly for the rest of eternity.

Legolas shifted a little, his thoughts jumping about randomly. He wasn't certain how to phrase what he was about to say. And always, the word '_gwanur_' echoed in his mind, reminding him again and again that she only looked to him as a brother.

Gimli looked at his friend expectantly, wondering what Legolas was going to say. Whatever it was, Legolas had certainly not consulted his best friend about it.

"There's going to be a gathering at in Faramir's hall soon, and both Gimli and I will be making the journey. The King and Queen of Gondor would be there. I was… I was wondering if you would like to join us."

Háthien stared at Legolas, stunned. Even Gimli was a little shocked. To be invited to such a gathering was a great honour. To be introduced to King Elessar by one of his closest friends was another. And it was all descending upon Háthien at the same time.

"Oh… of course I would love to join you!" It all burst out of Háthien at once, and a smile spread across her face. "I could imagine nothing better! Thank you!" She gave Legolas a hug.

Gimli noticed the softening of his friend's face as he put his arms around Háthien. _He really loves her_, he thought. _It is such a pity that he won't take the risk. Shouldn't she at least know?_

Excited, Háthien left them, and Gimli had no doubt that she was going to start making preparations for the journey. It wouldn't be her first time making the journey, but this time, it was much more important.

After she was out of sight, Gimli turned to his friend. "It wasn't exactly confessing your love, but I have to say that you did rather well."

"What do you mean, talking about 'confessing'? You know I'm never going to be able to say anything."

"You're never going to able to say anything because you won't dare to take the risk. I can't believe you, Legolas! You have no problem taking on an army of Orcs, but not talk to an elfmaiden?"

"There's a big difference, Gimli." Legolas sighed. "I don't want to risk our friendship. If I tell her, things will never be the same again. There'll always be a wedge between us, and we'll never be able to talk and laugh and spend time together like we do now. Do you understand that, Gimli? I don't know what I would do without all that."

"How do you know that would happen? You don't know anything. Don't you think it'll be worth a try? Just so you won't spend the rest of your life wondering what would have happened if only you had tried…"

Legolas shook his head. "I don't know, Gimli. I just can't. When I see her, I just don't know how I could possibly tell her."

Gimli said nothing in reply. This was certainly quite a mess, and there was no way anyone could help.

* * *

By the time Háthien got back to her room, her spirits had plunged. Legolas was going to introduce her to King Elessar and Queen Arwen, which was a great honour, but she had no doubt that he would introduce her as his sister. And it seemed to her that once the King and Queen thought her as Legolas' sister, it would be final. There would never be a chance for anything else. Not that there had ever been a chance, of course, but it felt as if once she was introduced, it would become a fact set in stone.

She sat down on her bed, staring into space. She wanted so much to tell him, to pour her heart out, to confess all her thoughts, but every time he spoke to her, every time he called her his sister, she was reminded of how he felt, and how things would change if she so much as implied something different. And she felt as if she would die if she were never to speak with him ever again, if she would lose this most cherished friendship.

Why did things have to be so difficult? It wasn't fair. Why did she just have to fall for Legolas? Why did she want to give her forever to him?

The questions ran through her mind, but she knew that she wouldn't have had it any other way. She could not imagine falling in love with anyone else, spending forever with anyone else.

But she wished that things could have been a little different.

* * *

Legolas sat staring out of the window of his room. In his heart was the yearning that the sea gulls had awoken, the yearning he spent every waking hour trying to push away, only to get lost in it in his dreams. There seemed to be no way to forget about the longing once it took hold.

It seemed as if he could hear the cry of the gulls, the break of the waves upon the shore, the sea spray on his face. He sighed. One day, he would have his chance to go to the Undying Lands, but it would not be anytime soon. He had decided that he would not leave Middle-Earth until after Aragorn's passing, and he would honour that promise. Yet there was another reason for his putting off the journey.

He could not go now, since Háthien had not said anything about leaving. He could not leave her here in Ithilien. There was no way. He wanted her to be near him, with him.

Why did things have to be so difficult?


	5. No, Nothing

_To RiRiana: I'm back! Again. Hehehe…_

_To Calafair: You know, Bel, you are VERY MEAN! GIVE ME DAMIAN BACK THIS INSTANT, YOUNG LADY! grabs him away from the cliff Seriously, how can you expect me to write for Boredom and Boys AND this at the same time at the expense of Damian? So, just to scare you… Rolfe does a little, high-spirited Irish jig dangerously near the cliff's edge_

* * *

**Chapter 5 : No, Nothing**

* * *

Finally, they had arrived at Faramir's hall.

They were greeted warmly by Faramir and his wife Éowyn. Háthien was especially glad to see Éowyn again. The two of them got along very well, and never found a dull moment in each other's company. They understood each other, and in Éowyn Háthien found the sister she never had, the sister she had often wished for.

"Oh it is so good to see your face again! It has been too long since you've come," Éowyn said as she hugged Háthien. "Legolas should bring you on his journeys more often."

"I wish he would too," Háthien replied with a smile. "But I'm afraid that I am too much trouble for him."

"Is that so, Legolas?" Éowyn asked, raising an eyebrow. "Is Háthien too much trouble for you?"

"Of course not," Legolas said. "I just thought that she would not enjoy so many journeys around all the time, and that she would be bored if she attended too many political meetings. If I had known that she wished to make these dull journeys, I would have brought her along more often."

"Well, now you know. But come, let's not just stand out here talking! You must be weary after the journey, no matter how short it has been. You'll be shown to your rooms."

* * *

Háthien sat on her bed, looking around the guestroom she would be staying in. It was not unfamiliar; she had always stayed in this room whenever she visited Faramir and Éowyn.

There was a knock on the door.

"Come in," she called. She already knew who it would be.

Éowyn entered, carrying something wrapped in cloth. "I have something for you, Háthien," she said with a smile.

Háthien got up from her bed. "Oh, you really shouldn't have, Éowyn! You know that there is no need for gifts between us."

"I know there's no need, but I just wanted to give this to you. I just hope that it would fit you." Éowyn unwrapped the cloth and lifted up the dress that was in it.

Háthien's breath caught. The dress was absolutely beautiful, lovely. It was a dark green, with exquisite, intricate embroidery along the edges, and sleeves that flared. "Éowyn, it's absolutely beautiful!" She smiled at her friend. "Thank you so much!"

Éowyn grinned, glad to see that her friend sincerely appreciated and liked the dress. "It was made by the best seamstress in Edoras. She made my wedding dress. She has never let me down before; she makes the loveliest dresses I have ever seen. Faramir agrees on that as well, although how much men know about dresses I do not know." She held it against Háthien. "It would be perfect for tonight, when we dine with the King and Queen. You would look absolutely stunning."

"When are they arriving in Ithilien?"

"Oh, in the late afternoon, I suppose. But you don't have to meet them then. I would think Legolas would like to introduce you more formally during dinner."

Once again, that sad feeling entered Háthien's heart. After tonight, she would be only his sister forever. "Thank you, Éowyn. You really are a good friend."

* * *

"Where is Háthien?" Legolas asked Faramir as they stood in the hall, waiting for Aragorn and Arwen.

"She's still in her room getting ready, I think. Éowyn is with her."

Legolas nodded. Háthien would want to look her best to meet the King and Queen. She was very excited about it.

At that moment, the door opened, and Éowyn entered the hall, followed by a lovely maiden dressed in dark green. With a start, Legolas realised that the maiden was Háthien. She looked more beautiful than ever, and he wanted nothing more than to wrap his arms around her and hold her close. She caught him looking at her, and smiled, coming towards him.

As she stood before him, for a moment he was simply speechless, staring at her.

"How do I look? Éowyn gave me this dress." Háthien turned a full circle for him to see. "Isn't the dress just lovely?"

Legolas smiled, taking Háthien's hand. "You look beautiful." He longed to tell her… but seeing her this incredible just reminded him how much he feared losing her.

Háthien blushed. "Thank you."

The main doors of the hall then opened, and a couple entered. There was no need for them to be announced; everyone knew who they were.

Legolas led Háthien towards them, a big smile on his face. He embraced the man and bowed his head to the lady. "Aragorn, Arwen, this is my dearest friend and sister, Háthien."

Háthien bowed deeply, trying to make sure that she left a good impression. "It is a great honour to be able to meet King Elessar and his Queen."

Arwen laughed and took Háthien's hands. "Come, there is no need for that. Any close friend of Legolas' will be a close friend of ours. I only marvel that Legolas has kept you away from us for so long! He speaks of you often when we meet."

Háthien glanced at Legolas. She had not known that before. It filled her with a happiness that could not be explained, followed by an aching sadness. _What did he say of me? Did he refer to me as his sister? He must have._

Aragorn smiled. "Yes, Legolas speaks of you all the time. It is as if there is nothing else in Ithilien for him to speak of!"

Háthien felt her cheeks heating up. "I had not been aware of that. Legolas has never told me much of his meetings."

"Shame on him for that! Come, you must sit with me when we dine, then we can speak while the men try to sort out their politics." Arwen led Háthien to the seat next to hers.

"You are too kind, my lady."

"Just call me Arwen."

They spoke through the meal. Arwen greatly enjoyed her company. It was always wonderful to be able to meet someone new, and she was glad that there was once more a woman she could speak in the Elvish tongue with. Háthien was intelligent, and a conversation with her was a joy.

"You must come and spend some time with me tomorrow," Arwen said with a smile after the meal was over.

"Of course, Arwen, I would be glad to spend time with you." Háthien returned the smile.

Someone tapped her on her shoulder, and she turned to see Legolas there. "Would you like to go for a walk in the gardens?" he asked. "It would be good to get some night air."

"All right." Háthien nodded, and they left the hall together.

"Did you enjoy dinner?" Legolas asked, even though he knew that she did. He had spent dinner watching her.

"Yes, I did. It was so easy to speak with Arwen! I had been worried at first how I would find them, but I should have known that you're a good judge of friends." Háthien smiled. "Gondor is in good hands."

"Yes, you're right. Aragorn is a wise ruler."

Háthien looked around at the trees, and stared up at the moon. "I can't believe that that is the same moon I looked up at in Mirkwood, so long ago." She sighed. "It feels as if it's been eternity, you know? Everything that I left behind in Mirkwood seems nothing more than a faded memory. Sometimes I feel guilty, to think that my family have become nothing to me but a memory. It feels as if they should be alive in me for forever, that I should think of them every single day…"

"I understand. Sometimes a full day goes by when I don't think of Mirkwood or my father, and the next day I feel as if I have done something wrong. But just because we don't think about it all the time doesn't mean that we've forgotten. We'll never forget; it's not possible. It's too much a part of our life," Legolas said reassuringly. "We'll always remember, and we'll always love. Don't you feel guilty, or worry."

Háthien nodded, and closed her eyes for a moment, just feeling the wind on her face. Legolas watched her. Perhaps there was no harm in telling her, perhaps she would understand…

"Háthien?"

She opened her eyes and turned to him. As he looked into those deep blue eyes, he remember every happy moment, every smile, and once again the fear hit him.

"Yes, Legolas?"

He shook his head. "No, nothing."


	6. If Only

_I'm so sorry I've been totally neglecting all my fanfiction because I've been spending all my time on this story over at FictionPress! Also because of a writer's block when it came to my stuff here… But now I'll try my best to write more over here!_

_To Calafair: Bel, you are an incredibly mean, sadistic person. It's said with a lot of affection but it's NOT a compliment, okay? (But I can still tell that you're going to be happy. Weirdo.)_

_To Shorty51: Thanks for the chocolate! –hands you the bowl- And I'm sorry I've been gone for so long!_

_To RiRiana: Update right here!_

_To BanbieBunny: I've avoided Mary-Sue-ism? YAY!_

* * *

**Chapter 6 : If Only**

* * *

_2 years later… (A/N: That is, after the last chapter.)_

* * *

Legolas and Háthien stood at the gates of Minas Tirith.

"You'll be missed," Legolas said, embracing her. "But you'll be taken care of here." He smiled. "And you'll get to meet Sam and his family! Tell him that I'm sorry I can't be here to greet him when he arrives, but I'll try to come to Minas Tirith to see him as soon as I can."

"Of course," Háthien replied. "He'll be sorry that you aren't here either, I'm sure." She looked at Legolas's face and laughed. "Come, I'll never be away for eternity! You'll see, before long I'll be back in Ithilien and you'll be back from Eryn Lasgalen and you'll be wishing that I never returned!" But still she felt pleased to see that Legolas would really miss her. _He has no idea how much I will miss seeing him._

"Perhaps that'll be true, but for now, it'll be different not seeing you every day," Legolas said seriously. _She has no idea how much I will miss seeing her._ "Well… now it's time for me to leave. I'll try to come to Gondor after coming from Eryn Lasgalen, all right? So just you try to keep out of trouble."

"Since when have I caused trouble?" Háthien retorted, making Legolas laugh.

"Don't make me name the times."

Háthien watched as Legolas rode out of the gates to join the other Elves who would be making the journey to Eryn Lasgalen with him. It had been many years since they had gone back to their homeland. To all extents and purposes, Ithilien was home now. Part of Háthien actually wished to return, just too look around at the dear forest she had grown up in, to recall all the sweet memories she had of that place. But a greater part of her told her that she would never be able to return, that she could not bear the sad familiarity of the trees, the life. So she had chosen to accept the invitation of Aragorn and Arwen, and come to Gondor.

She looked around her. It was… _different_, Minas Tirith. It felt different to be living in a place surrounded by stone after a life of living surrounded by trees. Although the stone brought safety and security, it also brought this foreign, closed-in feeling that she had yet to become accustomed to.

"It feels different, doesn't it? Strange."

Háthien turned to see Arwen standing behind her, an understanding smile on her face. "Don't worry, this feeling comes to every Elf who steps into Minas Tirith. But you'll soon fall in love with it, just as I have." She took Háthien's hand. "Come, let's go for a walk."

The people couldn't help but stop and stare as the two passed by. The radiance of Arwen was not something that one got used to quickly, and now there was this new beauty that was walking arm in arm with the Queen.

"She's another Elf!" one child whispered excitedly to another.

Háthien turned to smile at the two awestruck children, and they returned it with the innocent, sweet grins of little ones who held everything in life in wonder. "I believe you are right, Arwen" she said, turning to look back at the children, reluctant to lose sight of their happiness. "I think I am falling in love with Minas Tirith already."

"And soon you will get to meet Sam! Oh, it will be good to see him again. And his wife and daughter as well. I'm sure they will be delighted to meet you."

"I hope so. Legolas has told me so much of them."

"You and Legolas are very close, aren't you?"

Háthien nodded. "Yes, we are. He treats me as if I were his sister. Since the end of the War of the Ring, he has been taking care of me, and for that I am grateful. I don't know what I would have done without him."

Arwen smiled. "It's wonderful to have someone to take care of you, isn't it?"

"Sometimes it could present problems, though."

"Yes, that could be true." Arwen laughed sadly. "My father tried to take such good care of me, he almost had me leave Middle Earth. That was the only time I defied him. But I knew that it had to be done, even though it hurt him badly."

Háthien was silent. Everyone knew Arwen's fate. Her life was both blessed and cursed at the same time. Now it was filled with happiness, contentment and love, but one day it would be plagued with sadness and loneliness.

As if reading Háthien's thoughts, Arwen said, "Someday in the future there will be nothing for me, only darkness. But then I will be able to think back and see that I had everything I wanted, if only for a little while. I will have my memories to keep me company. What about you, Háthien? What will you think of when you sit down one day and reflect upon your life? Do _you_ have everything you long for?"

Seeing the look on Arwen's face, Háthien knew that she was caught. "No," she admitted. "I don't have everything I long for."

"Then what are you waiting for? It is all before you. All you have to do is reach out."

"If only it were that easy," Háthien said with a sigh. "But there is so much that I dare not risk…"

"It is the risks we take that make things worth the while."

"You won't tell anyone, will you?" Háthien asked anxiously. "You wouldn't let anyone know?"

Arwen laughed. "Of course I won't. You can trust me. This is something up to you to tell. It is up to you to decide if you want to keep it a secret forever, or to take the leap of faith. Think it over." With that, she let go of Háthien's arm and went on her way.

Háthien wandered about the streets of Minas Tirith for a while, lost in her thoughts. It suddenly seemed so clear to her what she had to do. She _had_ to tell Legolas. She couldn't be hiding forever. Arwen was right. She didn't want to spend the rest of her life regretting. It seemed so easy now!

If only it could stay that way once she saw Legolas again.


	7. The Hobbits

_Rewriting a fic is harder than writing a new one, that's what I've discovered._

_To Celtic Fairy: Thank you!_

_To Stacey: I think that's what all of us want to know!_

_To Shorty51: Here's more!_

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**Chapter 7 : The Hobbits**

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Elanor stared wide-eyed at all she saw around her. Her father had told her of the grandeur and wonder of Minas Tirith, but even so, she had never dreamt of such a great city. She, with her parents, were standing in the King's hall, waiting to be greeted by King Elessar and Queen Arwen. They had arrived a day early.

A door opened and the king and queen entered. A smile bloomed on the Arwen's face when she saw the hobbits. She had been awaiting their arrival with great anticipation. "How wonderful it is to see all of you again! Your hospitality to us when we were in the Shire was remarkable; now this is out chance to return the favour," she said.

"It was a pleasure to have you in the Shire," Sam said, blushing like he always did whenever someone paid him or the Shire a compliment.

Aragorn smiled. "Now the pleasure is ours."

"And there is someone else who would no doubt be delighted to meet you as well," Arwen added. "She has heard of your adventures during the War of the Ring, Sam, and I believe she would be eager to hear more from you."

"Who is it?" Elanor blurted out before she could catch herself. She winced. Try as she might to restrain herself, she was too prone to such outbursts.

Arwen laughed. "You have a curious daughter, Sam. Well, perhaps that would prove to be to her advantage in due time." She then turned to address Elanor. "You will get to meet her soon enough. Someone has gone to find her, to inform her of your arrival. Her name is Háthien."

"A close friend of Legolas's, although he kept her a secret for quite a while," Aragorn said with a smile.

_A friend of Legolas? Then she must be an Elf!_ Elanor smiled. She had only seen one Elf in her life, and that was the Queen. However, her father had told her of the members of the Fellowship, and so she felt as if she already knew Legolas. And now she would meet another Elf! It was all very exciting for a young hobbitlass.

The doors to the hall opened, and in came a young serving girl, followed by a tall lady that Elanor supposed to be Háthien. She studied the lady closely. She wasn't of an uncommon beauty like the Queen, but there was something from inside her that set her aside from everyone else. There seemed to be an energy bubbling inside her, threatening to burst out at any moment. She wore a bright smile that lit up her whole face.

"Ah, here she is," Arwen said, taking the lady's hand as she came to stand before the hobbits. "Sam, Rosie, Elanor, this is Háthien. Háthien, this is Sam, his wife Rosie and their eldest child, Elanor."

"It is lovely to meet all of you at last! I have heard such wonderful things of you and the Shire from Arwen," Háthien said.

Elanor took a liking to her immediately. Her voice was strong compared to the soft, delicate tones of the Queen, which further convinced Elanor that there was someone exciting and interesting in that body of lady, just waiting for the right occasion to be let out. It seemed as if she was the type of person who would understand Elanor's outbursts, or maybe have outbursts herself.

"It is very lovely to meet you too," Sam was saying, "Any friend of Legolas's will be a friend of mine."

"I'm glad to hear it," Háthien said with a smile. "And I'm sure Legolas would be most honoured that you have such high regard in his choosing of friends."

"I'm sure that you and Elanor would get along very well," Arwen said to Háthien.

"Come, let's not just stand about here! You must be tired from your travels. You'll be shown to your rooms, where you can wash and rest before dinner." Aragorn gestured to the serving girl who came forward, all ready to show the guests their rooms.

"Háthien seems very nice," Elanor whispered to her mother as they walked along the hallway.

"Yes she does," Rosie replied with a smile. Once she set eyes on Háthien, she had agreed with Arwen. Elanor and Háthien would probably get along very well. There was a fire in both of them that could be seen clear as day. Yes, they would be great friends.

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Elanor hurried along the streets of Minas Tirith as quickly as her hobbit feet could carry her. Her parents had allowed her to explore the city as long as she came back for dinner, but now she was terribly late. _I don't suppose there is any time to change into something nice now_, she thought disappointedly to herself as she rushed past people without even giving them a second glance, nor noticing the awed looks from some of the children who had never seen a Hobbit in their lives. _And I had planned to look pretty for dinner._

By the time she reached the hall, she was panting so hard that the guards had to help her open the door (not that she would have been able to open it herself anyway; the door was huge). She stumbled in to see her parents and the King and Queen staring at her, and felt her cheeks burning. "I'm sorry, I was… I was just looking around and… and… Minas Tirith is so lovely… nice people… so big… lost track of time… late," she gasped incoherently.

She was just about to hurry to take her place when she was almost bowled over by someone from behind. If that someone hadn't grabbed her arm, she would have found herself sprawled on the floor.

"Oh… oh dear I'm so sorry… are you all right? I'm sorry I'm late, I was just in the library reading and I didn't notice how late it was…"

Elanor glanced up to see Háthien looking as flushed and embarrassed as she was. All in all, not a very Elf-like scenario to witness.

Rosie gave her husband a look that plainly said, "See what I mean?" and Arwen was observed to do something of the same with Aragorn.

Aragorn laughed. "It's all right, we hadn't been waiting long. Come, take your places, and let's eat!"

Mumbling apologies again, Háthien and Elanor took their seats, Elanor next to her mother, and Háthien next to Arwen.

"Oh wouldn't Legolas find this all very funny," Háthien muttered to herself.

Aragorn overheard and laughed. "Yes, no doubt he would," he replied with a twinkle in his eye. "He did say that you were prone to such things from time to time."

"He did? But I rarely do such things!" Háthien insisted indignantly.

"I'm sure Legolas was just teasing," Sam said gallantly. "A lady like you… I can't believe that you would get into many embarrassing situations!"

Háthien beamed. "Why, thank you, Master Samwise!" _Legolas was right… these hobbits are really such lovely people!_


	8. Magic

_I got the extended version of RotK! It rocks! I've already seen it 3 times. Hehehe… I don't know why it was out on the 9th in Singapore but I'm sure not complaining!_

* * *

**Chapter 8 : Magic**

* * *

"Come, Father, you must dance!"

Sam smiled. "At least let me finish my ale, Elanor! You go along and have your fun first!"

Elanor grinned and gave him a kiss on his cheek before running back to join the dancing crowd. Sam smiled to see his precious daughter so happy. Indeed, it was a joyous scene before his eyes. The music echoed in the night. There were so many people dancing, laughing, singing along to the music. With such a sight before him, Sam could hardly believe that there had once been grief and despair in Minas Tirith.

"Why aren't you dancing?" Legolas asked as he sat down next to Sam. He followed Sam's gaze and smiled at all the dancers. Joy was beautiful, sacred. His eyes immediately spotted Háthien dancing amid the crowd. She was dancing alone with her eyes closed, oblivious to all around her but the steady beat of the music. A contented smile lit her face. To Legolas, she seemed to represent the epitome of happiness. The image made him want to laugh and cry at the same time.

Since that day he had left Háthien in Minas Tirith, he had made up his mind that he would try his very best to forget he had ever loved her as more than a sister, that he would never let anything change the relationship they had. It was far too precious.

"I might join in the dancing after this ale," Sam said, taking a sip. "What about you?"

Legolas laughed and shook his head. "I'm not a good dancer. I don't usually dance." And it was true too. He had hardly joined in any dancing at any parties. To see Legolas dancing was a very rare occasion indeed.

"I'm sure you're not that bad," Sam said good-naturedly.

"Oh, I assure you that I am, Sam," Legolas replied. "Perhaps in my youth I had spent too much time practicing archery and neglected dancing."

Somehow, Sam could believe that. He had never seen Legolas miss a target before. Just then he noticed Rosie coming towards him, wearing that sweet smile that used to get him shy and stuttering. It still affected him in some magical way.

"Elanor hasn't managed to dance, I see," she said, sitting down on his other side. "So now it's my turn to try."

"I told her that I would finish my ale," Sam explained for the third time that night.

Rosie took his mug. "Well, you've finished it, so now you must dance with me." She tugged on his arm. "Come on!"

Sam smiled fondly at his wife. "All right." He turned to Legolas. "Excuse us."

Legolas nodded. "Of course! You two go and have fun dancing your hearts out," he said with a smile.

The two hobbits nodded and disappeared into the crowd. Legolas continued to watch Háthien. After some time, she bumped into someone accidentally. She opened her eyes, turning to the person she had bumped into, and apologised. Then she turned back, and spotted Legolas watching her. A smile spread across her face slowly, and she began to make her way to him, one hand outstretched.

"Oh no…" Legolas began to say with a laugh, holding out his hands in front of him defensively and shaking his head. "You know I can't, Háthien!"

"Come, Legolas! All these years we've been such good friends, I have never seen you dance!" Háthien coaxed. "Surely you can't be that bad?"

"Trust me, I can."

"Well, I want to see it for myself," Háthien went on stubbornly. "You must dance with me! We haven't seen each other for such a while, will you deny me what I want?"

_I could never deny her anything_. With a sigh, Legolas got to his feet and let Háthien pull him towards the other dancers.

"You aren't that bad," Háthien told him after about five minutes. "You just have to enjoy the music, enjoy yourself!"

"It's hard to enjoy myself when I think that I am embarrassing myself."

Háthien laughed. "You aren't embarrassing yourself! That's the beauty of dancing. You can be anything you want to be, and no one will laugh at you."

A moment later Legolas found himself between Háthien and Rosie in a huge circle, everyone dancing together, laughing and cheering. He could barely even remember how he had got here, only that he really _was_ enjoying himself.

* * *

Legolas and Háthien broke away from the crowd laughing and went to stand against the wall to catch their breaths. "See, that wasn't so bad, was it?" Háthien asked, flushed from dancing. She watched Legolas, a smile brightening up his whole face. _This is the time to tell him…_

"You know, it was fun!" Legolas admitted. He gave a happy sigh. "Oh, let nothing ever change the way things are."

Háthien froze. _Let nothing ever change the way things are…_ After that, there was no way she could tell him. Telling him would certainly change things. She swallowed, collecting herself, then laughed. "Yes, let things be this way for always." Her heart pounding, she forced herself to smile and said, "Now, let me try to get Gimli on his feet." She walked away quickly, before she gave way to any tears.

Legolas watched her go, and tried to push away the uneasiness in his heart. He had made up his mind and he would not yield. From that day he had left Háthien in Minas Tirith, he had told himself that he would do his best to forget he loved her as anything but a sister. That was what she needed and that was what he would give. He could not let himself weaken. He watched as she tried to Gimli to his feet. Getting Gimli to dance was probably more difficult than persuading Legolas; that Dwarf favoured drinking games.

That was why Legolas was so surprised when Gimli actually got to his feet obligingly and followed Háthien.

"I never thought I would see the day. Both Legolas and Gimli dancing in one night!"

Legolas turned to see Aragorn coming towards him, grinning. "Yes, I suppose it _is_ a rare sight," he agreed.

"Háthien must have some sort of magic that persuades people to do things they don't usually do," Aragorn said.

Legolas laughed and nodded. "Either that, or we spoil her too much."

"I'd rather believe in her magic."

* * *

_Going to Italy tomorrow so I probably won't be writing until after Christmas! This is going pretty slow… I'm sorry!_


	9. Away

_I'm back! I seem to say that a lot…_

* * *

**Chapter 9 : Away**

* * *

YEAR 1482

* * *

Legolas sat alone in the gardens, leaning against a tree trunk. All around him there was silence except the rustling of the leaves as the wind blew through the branches of the trees around him. Peace and quiet for him to think, just how he liked it. Yet at times he found that it was growing too quiet.

So many of his people were leaving Middle-earth, bound for the Undying Lands. Too often did he had to bid friends farewell, trying to ignore the longing of his own heart. Not a day passed when he did not imagine the spray of the sea on his face, and the call of the gulls in the vast skies over his head. Not a day passed when he did not have fight a battle raging within. He had promised; a promise to Aragorn, and to himself. He had promised, of his own accord, to stay with his friend till the time came from Aragorn to depart. He had promised to be there to aid in any way he could. And he would never break his promise to such a dear friend.

He sighed as his thoughts turned from one desire to another. _Háthien._ It was always Háthien. She haunted his thoughts in a way that he hated and craved for, all at the same time. He wondered if his feelings were bordering on obsession. He wouldn't have been surprised if they were.

He had seen her, seen the way she acted. She thought that she hid it well, but he could tell that she wanted to make the crossing, wanted it to the very core of her being. The thought of the Sea and gulls affected her just as much as it did him. But she was different; she had made no promise. She owed nothing to anyone. She was free to leave if she wished it. And yet she stayed. Why?

He had asked once. Such questions were usually never asked, for such affairs where personal, private, not to be discussed so freely. She had not been offended, though, that he believed. She simply laughed and said, "How could I leave my dearest brother behind?" before excusing herself.

He gritted his teeth. He was not worthy of her suffering in this way. He could not bear the thought of her dwelling in silent agony for years, right before his eyes. He would have to persuade her to take a ship to Valinor; it was the only way. Losing her would shake him, but that was not important. What was important was that she found the peace she deserved, the peace that was waiting for her across the Sea. And he would find a way to make her board a ship.

That was his solemn vow to himself.

* * *

Longing and wishes.

Longing for peace and beauty beyond any imagination, and wishes for a love that would never come.

Háthien was torn, and she could find no rest in Ithilien any longer. The feeling that had descended upon her in Mirkwood after the War of the Ring, the feeling that made her come to Ithilien, had returned to her heart. And this time, it was urging her to cross the Sea with her people. The longing tugged at her every waking hour, and lurked at the back of her dreams.

Yet she could not let go of her wishes, her hopes. Her secret little fantasy that played itself out in her mind over and over again, until she felt that she had lived that life a million times a lifetime before, the fantasy that went on and on but was never enough. How could she sail away, knowing that Legolas would remain, and that there would be a chance she would never get to see his face again? How could she leave him behind just like that? It seemed unthinkable.

"You need to forget him," she told herself sternly. "Forget him. It is impossible, and you know it all very well. Forget your silly infatuation. How long have you clung on foolishly to this false hope?"

And still she knew that this foolishness would last.

* * *

_One week later…_

* * *

Legolas read and then reread the letter he held in his hand. In it he saw a chance to help Háthien, but his own selfish senses made him want to keep the letter and never speak of it with her, save mentioning the news it held of a mutual friend.

_Think of her, not yourself._

With a sigh he stood up and made his way to her room, before his resolve weakened again. He walked quickly, as if each minute lost was going to cost him his decision.

"Come in," Háthien called out when he knocked on the door.

She faced him with a smile as he entered, but it faded away when she saw the look on his face. "What's wrong, Legolas? What is it?" She sat down on her bed. "Tell me."

Legolas cleared his throat and took a seat by the window. "I have just received word about Sam."

"Is he all right?" Háthien asked anxiously.

"He is fine," Legolas reassured her. "The letter was written by Elanor. Her mother passed away not too long ago, and Sam, of course, is most upset about it. He is currently living with her, but she says that he is thinking of going to the Grey Havens."

"He is going to Valinor," Háthien said quietly. Then she caught Legolas' eye, and it dawned upon her. "You wish me to accompany him? You want to send me away?"

"No, of course I'm not sending you away. But you shouldn't force yourself to stay here just for me. It's not worth it. In Valinor you will find the peace you seek. I promised to take care of you on behalf of your family, and that is what I will do. They would have wanted you to take this chance."

Her breath caught. He knew her; he knew that she could not refuse when he put it this way. _Perhaps it is for your own good_, she thought. _It is your final chance to forget him._ She tried to look up, but found that she lacked the strength to meet his eyes. She nodded. "Yes, _gwador_."


	10. The Letter

_The next chapter will be the last… whew. I have to admit that I will be glad to finish this. It's fun to see how the story improves the 2nd time round, but I have to say that rewriting a story is definitely not as fun as writing a new one._

* * *

**Chapter 10 : The Letter**

* * *

Háthien cast one last look around her room, trying to remember every single little detail in it. She had come to love this place so much that leaving it forever felt as if she was leaving a part of herself behind. It had been her refuge for so long, a place where she had cried secret tears and confessed all her secret desires. And now she would never see it again. 

Closing her eyes, she shut the door and turned away. Saying goodbye was never easy. And there were still so many goodbyes left for her to say.

She found her friends waiting for her. The other Elves who were to join her on this last journey were already there with their horses. Her own mount had already been readied, and stood awaiting its mistress.

Gimli spoke to her first. "Have a good journey, Háthien," he said, squeezing her hand so tightly as if he would break her fingers. She smiled. On the outside the sturdy Dwarf seemed weathered and hard, yet once one got to know him, one would find that he had a heart of gold. She would miss such a loyal friend as he. "Take care of yourself."

"I will."

Éowyn threw her arms around Háthien's neck, hugging her tightly. "I will miss you so much," she said.

Háthien felt tears stinging her eyes, but tried her best to hold them back. "I will miss you too, Éowyn. You have been a faithful friend. I'll think of you often."

"You will be happy in Valinor," Faramir said with a smile, standing by his wife. "We will not know what awaits you there, and shall never find out, but I know that you will find peace and love there." He sighed. "It is never easy to say goodbye to a friend, and knowing that it will be forever just doesn't make it any easier."

"You speak my thoughts, Faramir." Háthien took his hand. "I thank you for all the times I enjoyed your hospitality, and wish you many more years of happiness."

The goodbyes seem to last forever, and with each friend she bade farewell, she felt as if a part of her had been torn out. She had imagined saying goodbye to her friends, yet it had not prepared her for the pain of parting. And she had not even said goodbye to the dearest person…

Finally she came to Legolas. He stood with his hands behind his back, looking down at the ground. He looked up as she came to stand before him. For a moment they stood that way, both trying to find the words to say, and finding nothing.

Just as Legolas cleared his throat, determined to say _something_, Háthien flung her arms around him. "I don't want to say goodbye to you," she whispered fiercely.

"Then don't," he told her. "I will see you again." As they pulled apart, he thrust a letter into her hands. "This is for you. Read it only when you are at sea, all right? Promise me."

"I promise." She kept the letter, unable to hold back her tears any longer. "How long will it be till we meet again?"

Legolas shook his head. "No one knows, but I promise you that I will see you again. And you know I keep my promises, don't you?"

Háthien could only nod dumbly. This parting was so much more painful than any others, and she wanted to cling on to him, begging him not to send her from his side. But she knew that nothing good would come out of that sort of behaviour, and so there was nothing else to do but to follow obediently when he took her hand and led her to her horse.

As the travelling party began to ride away, Legolas could only stand by and watch as the distance between him and his dearest love grew. _I hope I have done the right thing._ He knew that Háthien needed to go to Valinor, but could not ignore the nagging feeling in his heart that something tremendous was happening, that something was going very wrong with this parting. _It is my own selfishness_, he told himself. _The longing in my heart that wants her to stay with me._

With a sigh, he turned away and walked back to his room, even though the party was still in sight. He just had not the heart to see Háthien disappear from sight. _At least she has the letter. She will know the truth in time._

* * *

The journey had been uneventful, and over the party there had been a silence that no one had the heart to break. In each of their own ways, each traveller was saying goodbye to all that they passed, trying to reconcile themselves to the fact that they would never see Middle-earth again. 

It had been good to meet Sam again, yet the reunion had been different from all others. Perhaps it was due to the feeling of finality that came with it. They had boarded the ship with the same reverent silence that had ruled over the journey.

The feelings only came pouring back as the ship pulled out of the harbour, and Háthien stood on deck watching as they drew away from Middle-earth. It had been home all her life, and it had been the backdrop to so many of her memories. All the laughter and the tears, the songs and the heartaches. It felt strange to know that she was leaving it behind.

Next to her, Sam sighed. "Goodbye, Middle-earth," he said softly.

"It's difficult to accept it, isn't it?" she asked gently. "Leaving it all behind?"

"Yes, it is. When I was just a lad in the Shire, I'd never imagined leaving it. And now I find that I'm leaving the whole of Middle-earth behind me. Funny how time can change things. You just never know what is going to happen and how that's going to change you."

"That's true," Háthien agreed. When Celoril had first introduced her to Legolas, never in her dreams had she imagined that things would have gone so far. _Legolas…_ The thought of him brought tears to her eyes again. She took a deep breath. "Still… we will find peace in Valinor, and much happiness."

Sam nodded, but did not tear his eyes away from the land he loved. Then he suddenly turned around. "I think I will go below for awhile," he said, and walked off, seemingly oblivious about whatever was going on around him. He had just felt as if he needed to be alone, in peace and quiet, to think about everything that lay before him.

Háthien remained on deck. She had no wish to go to her room, closed in and alone. Out here at least she could still see the vastness of the realities around her, and it kept her from brooding too much.

Unable to shift her gaze from the shrinking land, her hand brushed against something in her bag. She looked down and pulled out a folded piece of paper. _The letter_. Through the journey, it had slipped her mind, and now she found herself staring at it as if it were strange to her. _He said to read it when I was at sea… I suppose that means now._ She broke the seal and unfolded the paper.

It could not have really been called a letter, for there were only six words written on the paper:

_Háthien, I'm in love with you._

Her hands shook as she read those six simple words over and over again, unable to believe it. Had her own love blinded her? How could she not have known, she who was closest to him? She looked up again. Middle-earth had already vanished, even to her eyes. There was no turning back. No matter what she said or did now, there was no way the ship would turn back and return to Middle-earth. He must have known that, and yet he only wished her to know when she was on board and sailing away?

He knew that she longed for the Sea, and he had made sure that her wish was fulfilled, even if he wanted so badly for her to stay. Yet they had both unknowingly made such a great mistake, a mistake that would cost them so much more waiting.

* * *

_I'm afraid that even if this is an improvement from the first version it still isn't much good. I guess I'm just not cut out to write Legomances because after awhile they do irritate me a little. But oh well, I'm finishing this!_


	11. At Last

_Here it is, the last chapter!_

* * *

**Chapter 11 : At Last**

* * *

At last the day had come. The long years that had passed had been full of fulfilled promises, but also of almost unbearable waiting. Waiting to see Háthien again. If she still wanted to see him. He wondered if his letter had destroyed their relationship forever.

"Thinking of her again?" Gimli asked, already knowing what his friend would say. Legolas had only confided in his best friend about his feelings two days after Háthien had left. Honestly, Gimli had not been very surprised. For awhile he had had his suspicions, but seeing the way the two behaved around each other, the way they were trying so hard to be brother and sister, made him decide to keep quiet about it unless one of them approached him.

Legolas sighed and nodded. The sea surrounded them on all sides, Middle-earth long out of sight. Hopefully it would not be long before they reached the Undying Lands. "I can't help myself, Gimli. I can't help worrying. What if things get awkward between us? I don't know what I would do; an eternity of seeing her but not being able to be around her."

Gimli shook his head. "Don't worry yourself too much about that. My guess is that things will be even better than you can imagine once we arrive at Valinor. She will appreciate you telling her the truth, even if she does only think of you as a brother. Your friendship is much too strong to be broken."

"Do you really think so?" Legolas sounded uncertain.

"I know so," Gimli said firmly.

Legolas said nothing, but nodded. His eyes scanned the horizon, yet there was no indication of what it was that he was looking for. Gimli thought that instead of the vast ocean, his friend was seeing something else, something that everyone else on board the ship could neither see nor imagine. He would be of no use here now. Without saying another word, he got up and left the deck.

The image of his friend walking away from him hardly registered in Legolas's mind. He was already imagining what would happen when he arrived in Valinor. Terrible thoughts plagued his mind, but amongst them floated sweet thoughts of everlasting happiness. He no longer knew if he were asleep, wandering about in countless dreams and nightmares, or awake and losing his mind.

What he _did_ know was that he would not be able to find peace or rest until he saw Háthien again.

* * *

Legolas knocked on Gimli's door, perhaps a little more urgently than he really needed to. His friend opened the door on the fifth knock. "What is it?" he asked, looking puzzled. After so many days at sea he could think of no credible reason for why his friend would be so excited. Surely there could be no such thing as pirate attacks so far away from the shores of Middle-earth?

"Land! We've sighted land!"

_That would explain it._ And honestly, Gimli was relieved. He had been getting a little tired of being confined in this ship. It was a beautiful ship, of course, yet after awhile it could get tiresome. He would never understand what sailors loved about living in ships. "Wonderful!" he said with genuine enthusiasm. "Let's go on deck."

Legolas was already halfway up.

When Gimli appeared on deck, Legolas was already looking out, a nervous smile on his face. Gimli looked in the direction of which his friend was gazing, and felt a sinking in his heart. "Is this a joke, Legolas? I don't see anything."

"There's land!" Legolas insisted. "It's right there!"

"Well, you have to remember, my good friend, that I don't have Elf eyes."

"And I'm telling you, it's there!"

Gimli held up his hands defensively. "All right, all right, I believe you. I was just saying that I can't see it yet."

Legolas had nothing to say in response to that, and so they just stood in silence, waiting for the ship to draw closer. It was not long before Gimli could see it too. The mist around the ship had seemed to draw away slowly until it suddenly disappeared, and there lay Valinor, green and beautiful. They had finally arrived.

* * *

There were people waiting for them as they got off the ship. The first two they saw were Frodo and Sam, the two Hobbits overjoyed at reuniting with such old friends. Sam, it seemed, was still awed over the loveliness of the land. "It's so green all the time, with flowers growing everywhere!" he said happily, his simple gardener's senses taking over him. Gimli laughed. Sam would find happiness and hope anywhere, even in the darkest hours.

Legolas smiled, but it was obvious that he had not really heard anything that had been said. There was no doubt who he was looking for.

"She's here somewhere," Gimli told him.

"Who? Háthien?" Sam asked. "Oh yes, yes she's coming. We stopped by her house on our way here, and she seemed to be preparing something big. She said that she would be coming as soon as she possibly could."

Frodo leaned forward as if about to tell a huge secret. "I would say that she isn't a very good cook."

"I heard that!"

Legolas looked up and saw Háthien standing not too far behind the four of them. Their eyes met, and she smiled and nodded.

"You might not think me a very good cook, but speak only after you've tried what I've prepared," she said to the group, coming forward to join them.

Gimli cleared his throat. "Come on, let's leave these two alone to talk," he said, ushering the Hobbits away, asking them if they had met the Lady Galadriel recently.

The moment the three walked away, Háthien threw her arms around Legolas' neck and hugged him tightly. Then she whispered in his ear the most precious words he had ever heard.

"I'm in love with you too."


End file.
